While we perceive life as flowing like a river, Greek philosopher Heraclitus once said, “Nobody can step into the same river twice,” meaning once a moment passes, it can’t be relived. Overthinking a relationship can undoubtedly turn a healthy one poisonous. Your thoughts have the power to sow doubt in your relationships with other people if you give in to them and let them take you too far.
Here’s how it can affect relationships:
1.
Communication failures
: These often result from overthinking, leading to incorrect interpretations of words and actions. Conflicts and disagreements can arise when partners presume negative intentions or interpretations when none exist.
2. Stress: Analyzing conversations and events incessantly can lead to high levels of stress for both partners. Stress can have both physical and emotional effects, impairing general well-being and interpersonal effectiveness.
3. Mistrust: Trust in a relationship can be damaged by overanalysis. The foundation of trust can be undermined when one partner consistently doubts the other’s motives or behavior, leading to feelings of unease and suspicion.
4. Spiraling of issues: Overthinking a problem can exacerbate it. Overthinkers tend to focus on perceived slights or transgressions, exaggerating them and unnecessarily escalating disagreements, rather than addressing issues immediately and honestly.
5. Emotional distance: When one or both partners overthink a situation, they may withdraw or become defensive in response to perceived threats or criticism. This can lead to emotional distance between them, resulting in feelings of loneliness and isolation within the partnership.
6. Diminished intimacy: Overthinking can impede intimacy in a relationship. It’s challenging to connect emotionally and physically when one or both partners are consumed by anxious thoughts and fears, leading to a decline in closeness, intimacy, and affection.
7. Decision-making: Overthinking can paralyze decision-making in a relationship. Overthinkers may struggle to make decisions, causing frustration and resentment in their partner. Simple decisions like where to go for dinner or more significant ones like changing careers or starting a family can become difficult.
Lord Krishna in the Bhagavad Gita says, “When a man thinks of objects, attachment to them arises; from attachment, desire is born; from desire, anger arises. From anger comes delusion; from delusion, the loss of memory; from the loss of memory, the destruction of discrimination; from the destruction of discrimination, he perishes.”
Seize every moment in your relationship to live it, not to overthink it. Dwelling on the past and worrying about the future can detract from the glory and magic of the present. Now is the time to repair, restore, rejuvenate, and build upon your relationship. Now is the time to cherish the most joyous moments together.
The past is gone, and the future is yet to come. So, being present for each other allows couples to explore opportunities for celebration. Analyzing, thinking, and overthinking can lead to suffering.
Authored by: Dr. Mickey Mehta, holistic health expert
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